Valentine’s Day Reflection

Today, I asked myself, “What is love?”

This is a question I’ve often caught myself considering many times before. A seemingly simple term that carries with it so many implications. At what point does it become acceptable for us to “love” someone else? It is time-dependent or dynamic?

We seem to search for love yet so many people fear it when faced.

Each of us comes from a place of past experiences – we all have a story – we all have memories – and we carry those with us. I have experienced this before and given the number of stories I’ve been told, I know others have as well.

While I am a big advocate of reflection – I’m also a big supporter of re-evaluation.

I think it’s crucial that we take what we’ve gone through and use it to build ourselves up. To learn from what we’ve experienced while still remaining open TO experience. In the end, a closed wall blocks all. It’s too easy to miss out on something great.

I think there is a societal expectation that “love” should feel or work in a certain way. While I don’t know that love can (or should) necessarily be defined in words, I do believe love has identifiable characteristics. I think loving someone is looking past their flaws and embracing them for the person that they are. Recognizing that each person has both strengths and weaknesses and both can be built upon. Seeing what makes a person special and embracing them for those traits.

I remember this one time in my psychology class, we were asked: “Would you rather date someone who is similar to you or the complete opposite?” and most people responded, “The opposite. Someone who complements me.” However, it turns out that most people are actually happier with someone who is similar to them. In my experience, this has held true. I’m happiest when I’m with someone who I can relate to and understand while still learning from them in the process.

Furthermore, I think having our differences is beneficial because without those differences, what would we teach one another? When disagreement is an issue, a willingness to communicate and learn from one another helps sustain a greater sense of harmony. I think that alone is the key to a successful relationship, assuming both parties are on-board.

Right now, I don’t know how to feel about love. I thought I did. But maybe I don’t. It’s definitely more confusing than anything else I’ve ever tried to understand.

Maybe this isn’t uncommon? I’d like to think that when you really truly care about someone, love will find a way to bring those two people together. Maybe you know who that person is or maybe you don’t. But I do believe that nature has a certain way of bringing people together that opens the possibility of establishing a connection of love and trust, unlike anything you’ve ever experienced before. Sometimes it just takes time. So give it time.

In the meantime, I think people must exercise patience. Hold true to your core beliefs, remember who you are, and express your love unconditionally to the world.

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Happy Valentine’s Day! <3